Posted: Jul 02, 2012 10:00 AM
Getting together for drinks has become more acceptable for couples these days, what with the stress of raising kids and all. (We get it!) So, when others discover that my husband and I are the sober couple we find it can cause making plans suddenly a little awkward. For you. Since we aren't fans of uncomfortable moments, we want to explain why it's not you, it's us -- and why we can still be your fun go-to couple.

It hasn't always been easy being the sober couple, but we're finding as the years go by, that it seems to be a lot harder for those of you who do drink. Which always strikes us a bit odd.

Why we are sober

Since we know you want to know. We haven't always been, I guess... sober. (Which just sounds bad because we're not at all saying we were ever drunks or that you are. Okay, here we are again... awkward.)

... with a family history of alcohol abuse... one day he just decided that it was ending with him and hopefully our family.

We used to drink it up and enjoy a glass of wine or beer with the best of them. But, with a family history of alcohol abuse on both sides of my husband's family, one day he just decided that it was ending with him and hopefully our family. While he didn't have a problem with it himself (no, really!), he still made the decision to never drink again. He just didn't want to take any chances and especially didn't want it in the house or around our kids.

I admired him for making such a tough but noble decision.

And then I asked what any loving and supportive wife would: "So, does that mean I can't drink either?" (I really didn't have a problem and have no family history. That has been shared, at least. Secretive bunch we are.)

But because I am a loving and supportive wife, I have decided not to drink at home (not even in the closet when my kids are driving me insane) -- but will partake in the occasional cocktail or glass of wine when out with the girls, mmm... about three times a year. (Girls' night happens more often, it's the drinking that's less.)

Why it's kind of a bummer for us

We kind of feel left out being the non drinkers (that's a much better term) of the world.

  • We can't make jokes about needing a glass of wine, lest our children (who have alcoholism in their family) hear us.
  • We don't get to sit on the porch together reminiscing about the day with a glass of wine in our hand.
  • Where our neighbors used to invite us to their seasonal parties, they have now stopped as they realized we were the only ones not drinking.
  • We love enjoying live music, but we rarely get invited out to listen to a band, especially when it's at a bar.
  • We can't purchase any fun winery tours or horseback riding/wine tasting combos on those coupon websites. (Why must they always go together?)
  • And suddenly people feel the need to explain the bottle of wine they pick up for their stay with you when they come in from out of town. (Yes, I'm writing about you!)

So you drinkers, listen up

Your non-drinking friends? We are still a gosh darn fun bunch. We can still party it up like the rest of them. (Until 10 p.m., at which time Dateline starts and we should probably get going.) Kidding! (Kind of.)

  • We still like to dance at weddings and parties.
  • We still want to be at your parties.
  • We still want to ride horses and sing at Karaoke Night. (Okay, maybe that's just me.)
  • And the best part? We can totally drive you home at the end of a fun night out... hold your hair, and remind you of all the funny/awkward things you said the night before.

Most importantly, we sober, fun folks need you to know this:

When you drink? Be assured we most definitely don't care that you are.

And we most certainly aren't judging you. (Usually.)

Because, this time it's the truth.

It really isn't you. It's us.

So, can we please get a cheers to that?

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