Posted: Apr 21, 2014 9:00 AM
A recent post on Return of Kings claims, "Not only is short-hair unattractive, it’s one of the biggest signals a man can get that a woman is damaged beyond repair." As a woman with short hair, I have a few thoughts.
Photo credit: Lorraine Boogich/ iStock/360/ Getty Images

The link said, "Girls With Short Hair Are Damaged," so as I sat with my messy pixie cut, I clicked out of curiosity. I had never heard of the Return of Kings website, so I wasn't exactly prepared for the chauvinist and vulgar perspectives showcased there. (Read at your own risk. It's pretty rough.)

"No woman in all of human history has ever looked better with short hair than she would with a head full of healthy locks," according to Tuthmosis, author of the article.

He goes on to say that, "Short hair is a political statement. And, invariably, a girl who has gone through with a short cut — and is pleased with the changes in her reception — is damaged in some significant way. Short hair is a near-guarantee that a girl will be more abrasive, more masculine and more deranged."

I stopped reading there, and took a moment to think. I do realize that luscious hair, just like having curves or white teeth, signals to others on a biological level. It says, "Hey, I'm a good pick for a mate. My shining hair is proof of my youth and health." Yes, I know. And for that reason (subconsciously), I kept my hair long for years. And it didn't do me any favors. With strangers, I often hid behind it, shyly peeping out to say something with a mousy little voice that only went unheard.

Then I got married, and began to feel much more comfortable in my own skin. And after my first child was born, I lost a bunch of weight and felt like a million bucks… and I chopped all my hair off (per my husband's prodding).

It's about confidence. It's about loving the person that I am, inside and out.

It did indeed help me to interact with people a little differently, though I didn't see much change in the way people interacted with me. And yes, it does feel like a kind of a statement, having hair this short. But not one of aggression or masculinity — the statement I feel my short cut makes is that I'm comfortable with how I look without having to frame my face just right or spend hundreds of dollars making my hair shinier. I don't feel the need to have a curtain of locks to hide behind. I like my face just as God made it. It's about confidence. It's about loving the person that I am, inside and out. Some girls can't pull of long hair — I feel I'm one.

Every hair style makes a statement. And every item in my wardrobe. And every toy I buy my kids. We can't avoid "making statements," political or otherwise. But if I'm going to make one, I choose to state the truth: I am a powerful, happy person. Tuthmosis chooses to hide behind the identity of an Egyptian pharaoh and use his writing to belittle those who disagree with his incredibly chauvinist and ignorant perspective on femininity… talk about a statement.

Tuthmosis, whoever you are, I am not deranged or damaged or at war with my own femininity. I like the way my face looks with less hair around it, that's all. And if that scares away men like you, that's quite a bonus.

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